Saturday, March 5, 2011

Books for the Wait: I Wish for You a Beautiful Life & Dreaming a World

I Wish for You a Beautiful Life: Letters from Korean Birth Mothers of Ae Ran Won to Their Children edited by Sara Dorow with an Introduction by Mrs. Han Sang-soon (Yeong and Yeong, 1999)

Dreaming a World: Korean Birth Mothers Tell Their Stories edited by Sangsoon Han (Yeong and Yeong, 2010)

I admit it: I'm a bargain hunter. When it comes to books, bookfinder dot com is my personal shopper :). So I don't say this lightly: if you love a child adopted from Korea, I Wish for You A Beautiful Life and Dreaming A World are must-haves that are worth every penny of the price in hard cover. Truth is: the insights they offer into the minds and hearts and circumstances of women in Korea are priceless.

But they are more than a treasure to share with your children someday. Read them while you wait. They will help your heart come to grips with the complex truths of grief and loss in adoption. Those complexities and ambiguities are emotionally weighty, especially after we have received a referral and have pieces of a story, not abstracts to consider.  Processing the information will tap your emotional and mental reserves, compounding any  more typical stresses you face during the wait. So use these books to squarely face the realities underlying adoption from Korea, losses that are easier to process while weeping with Korean mothers over the words they wanted to pass into the future to their children.

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